it was just...meh

so, i got a little crazy the other night and decided i needed to get laid before i hit the six month mark. and by decided i mean i was out and there was a guy who was making me laugh and i thought, what the hell. cause i'm a girl who likes sex and when i want it, i want it and i just don't care what others may think or say. commonly referred to as a whore in this culture, but whatever, i prefer being thought a whore than a spinster. so we go back to my house, kiss a little, good chemistry, once he got the go from me he was surprisingly aggressive (in a good way) and we go the bed. oh my god. it was so disapointing. it wasn't tiny or anything, but sonofabitch, what is WITH the small dicks lately? i swear all the damn men i've slept with in the last year, with the exception of the fiasco and one other guy, had small dicks. they weren't even big enough to be called cocks, for fucks sake. what is going on? is it a conspiracy to get me to stop liking sex and preferring my rabbit to men altogether? a giant cosmic joke to give me some of the best sex ever with the most emotionally immature and unavailable guy i've met in years? is someone trying to tell me something? it just can't be right that such a concentration of small dicks can befall one woman, unless i've just been the luckiest little whore in the world and had big ones up until one year ago. and then, because they know they don't have the biggest ones in the room (cause, yeah, um, HI, my normal size vibrator was a good inch at least bigger than him), they have to do all this crazy shit. i haven't had sex in six months man, do not try to fuck me like a professional acrobat. i do not need to be flipped around every five seconds, i do not need you to pound away on me forever, i do not need you to do really anything else cause it's just not going to happen. i'm sorry, it's just not. you just go to sleep now and i'm gonna finish up the job with my rabbit, cause this is just SO NOT WORKING. jesus, my whole body hurts today, two days later, cause of all the acrobatic shit this guy wanted to do. and, while i totally love the validation, i know i give great hummers. i do not need you to tell me it was the best one you've ever had FIFTEEN TIMES. really, once, maybe twice is fine. REALLY. for the love of god, what does a girl have to do to get a good man with a nice cock and a some sexual talent around here? i'm going to go out and buy like 10 cats and just knit all day and become the spinster i so dread if this shit keeps up.