it's raining men, hallelujah, it's raining men

well, it just goes to show. you know that crap people spout about how you'll find someone once you stop looking? yeah, it's still crap, but i swear, ever since i just let the whole idea of love go, along with the choking bitterness i was starting to feel, men just started popping up. all over the damn place. the fiasco is in town this weekend. quit his job and came out here to visit. i'm thinking he's gonna want to come over, and boy do i need that in the physical sense, but i really don't know if i should do it. i just don't. i might if he promises never to move here again. if he lived here i would just be in hell, hell i say. and then there's the internet men. you would think they would be from dating sites, but OH NO, i seem to be "meeting" men in other places. like the guy from the messageboard. and a certain blogger who i had a wonderful chat with that got me all excited, and optimistic (i haven't heard much from him since then though, so i'm a little disillusioned) and the IT guy (i will cop to him coming from a dating site, but he approached me, so...) from the local hospital who lives in PB. here's my dilemma: what am i supposed to do with this? i don't have free time. i don't have the ability to date. i have a little boy who is here a lot. i don't know how to let anyone into my life. i really, really don't. it's been so long, over two years, since i've had a regular boyfriend. what if anything comes of all this man-rain? i don't know, i really just don't. it should be interesting though, that's all i can say. and let's just hope these particular men are not part of the small peter club like the rest of the losers of the last year and a half, mmmk?